Sir Isaac Newton first observed that "color is a quality of light." In other words, objects actually have no color. What we see is the light objects deflect. What's more, the color we see depends on the colors surrounding the object, what we were previously looking at, and even what color we expect to see. It was not until the 1960s that scientists began to understand the process by which the eye and brain perceive color -- however, it is certain that humans, fish, bees and butterflies can see in color, while but most other creatures cannot. (So a bull is just as likely to charge a white flag). 

One evening Rene Descartes went to relax at a local tavern. The tender approached and said, "Ah, good evening Monsieur Descartes! Shall I serve you the usual drink?". Descartes replied, "I think not.", and promptly vanished. 
 

Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules. 
Mathematics is a game with rules and no objectives. 
 

A biologist, a physicist and a mathematician were sitting in a street cafe watching the crowd. Across the street they saw a man and a woman entering a building. Ten minutes they reappeared together with a third person. 
        - They have multiplied, said the biologist. 
        - Oh no, an error in measurement, the physicist sighed. 
        - If exactly one person enters the building now, it will be empty again, the mathematician concluded. 
 

One day a farmer called up an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician and asked them to fence of the largest possible area with the least amount of fence.  The engineer made the fence in a circle and proclaimed that he had the most efficient design. The physicist made a long, straight line and proclaimed "We can assume the length is infinite..." and pointed out that fencing off half of the Earth was certainly a more efficient way to do it. The Mathematician just laughed at them. He built a tiny fence around himself and said "I declare myself to be on the outside." 
 

The Evolution of Math Teaching 
        1960s: A peasant sells a bag of potatoes for $10. His costs amount to 4/5 of his selling price. What is his profit? 
        1970s: A farmer sells a bag of potatoes for $10. His costs amount to 4/5 of his selling price, that is, $8. What is
        his profit? 
        1970s (new math): A farmer exchanges a set P of potatoes with set M of money. The cardinality of the set M is
        equal to 10, and each element of M is worth $1. Draw ten big dots representing the elements of M. The set C of
        production costs is composed of two big dots less than the set M. Represent C as a subset of M and give the
        answer to the question: What is the cardinality of the set of profits? 
        1980s: A farmer sells a bag of potatoes for $10. His production costs are $8, and his profit is $2. Underline the
        word "potatoes" and discuss with your classmates. 
        1990s: A farmer sells a bag of potatoes for $10. His or her production costs are 0.80 of his or her revenue. On
        your calculator, graph revenue vs. costs. Run the POTATO program to determine the profit. Discuss the result
        with students in your group. Write a brief essay that analyzes this example in the real world of economics. 
 

A cat has nine tails. 
Proof: 
No cat has eight tails. A cat has one tail more than no cat. Therefore, a cat has nine tails. 
 

Salary Theorem 
        The less you know, the more you make. 
        Proof: 
        Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power. 
        Postulate 2: Time is Money.
        As every engineer knows: Power = Work / Time 
        And since Knowledge = Power and Time = Money 
        It is therefore true that Knowledge = Work / Money . 
        Solving for Money, we get: 
        Money = Work / Knowledge 
        Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of Work done. 
 

The following problem can be solved either the easy way or the hard way. 

Two trains 200 miles apart are moving toward each other; each one is going at a speed of 50 miles per hour. A fly starting on the front of one of them flies back and forth between them at a rate of 75 miles per hour. It does this until the trains collide and crush the fly to death. What is the total distance the fly has flown? 

The fly actually hits each train an infinite number of times before it gets crushed, and one could solve the problem the hard way with pencil and paper by summing an infinite series of distances. The easy way is as follows: Since the trains are 200 miles apart and each train is going 50 miles an hour, it takes 2 hours for the trains to collide. Therefore the fly was flying for two hours. Since the fly was flying at a rate of 75 miles per hour, the fly must have flown 150 miles. That's all there is to it. 

When this problem was posed to John von Neumann, he immediately replied, "150 miles."  "It is very strange," said the poser, "but nearly everyone tries to sum the infinite series."  "What do you mean, strange?" asked Von Neumann. "That's how I did it!" 
 

KNOWLEDGE WILL FOREVER GOVERN IGNORANCE: AND A PEOPLE WHO MEAN TO BE THEIR OWN GOVERNOURS, MUST ARM THEMSELVES WITH THE POWER WHICH KNOWLEDGE GIVES.

EQUAL LAWS PROTECTING EQUAL RIGHTS ARE THE BEST GUARANTEE OF LOYALTY & LOVE OF COUNTRY

Madison to Jacob de la Motta, August, 1820 
 

How to write good:

It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
Contractions aren't necessary.
The passive voice is to be avoided.
Prepositions are not the words to end sentences with.
Be more or less specific.
Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
One word sentences? Eliminate.
Who needs rhetorical questions?
Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
 

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